Sometimes trying to keep up with work, a social life, family life, self care, the latest must watch TV show can feel like a never ending circle of activity that you can never stop. Do you feel like you are just surviving and juggling so many different things that if you stop to breathe for a moment everything will come crashing down and it will be a disaster and it will be all your fault?

You are not alone! We put ourselves under so much pressure and the added spice of social media and following the latest trends, whether that is fashion, watching a tv show or just chatting on the latest app with all of your friends all of the time, can lead to mental and physical exhaustion.

I have been there, we have all been there! Over time I have begun to realise what is important to me, and why – I don’t always get it right but I am a lot better. This can take some time as we often do things or want to do things because we feel we should, or we are expected to. However, I have some top tips for you to help with feelings of being overwhelmed.

• Write a list

This is my go-to absolute favourite when I have a lot of tasks to do. Sometimes my head spins and I feel like I don’t know where to start. So I write everything I have to do down in a list – in any order – and when I have everything written down, I look for the priorities and assign each one a number based on the order I will do it. Sometimes I leave the most important thing until last or halfway through, as if it is something I need to concentrate on I see if there are any smaller quick tasks I can get done first. This means I can absolutely put all my concentration and effort where it is needed without worrying about the small stuff because it’s already been done.

• Say ‘No’ occasionally

 Do you think if you say No to something it makes you a bad person? We seem to be hardwired to please others and often this makes us accept invitations and offers even when we don’t really want to. Let me tell you, it is ok to say no to something if you really don’t want to do it. I promise you not everyone will immediately stop talking to you. You can explain your reasons if you feel you have to but saying no sometimes is essential to good mental health and friends and family will understand this.

• Understand what is important to you

This really links in with number 3, priorities change over time and one week you might want space and peace and another you might want to raise hell with your best friend. Being in tune with how you feel and knowing your priorities can help you make the right decisions for everyone.

• Let go of perfectionism

Perfection means something different to everyone and constantly striving for ‘Perfect’ can create a feeling of overwhelm as we feel like we never achieve it. Understand that perfect is not always possible and anyway what is perfect for you might be terrible for someone else. Instead of looking for perfect, know what good enough means – balance this off by asking what is the benefit of spending more time on this task for marginal improvement? Recognise that ‘done’ is often better than ‘perfect’

• Focus on the moment

Instead of worrying about everything you have to do, focus on what you are doing. Keeping yourself in the moment and working through your tasks one by one will help reduce this feeling. If necessary, take some deep breaths and refocus yourself on the feeling of the breath in your body to bring yourself to the moment.

• Understand what you can control

Worrying about something you cannot control is an anxiety causing waste of time. If you can do something about then do it. If you can’t then worrying about it is not going to change that. Yes it can be difficult to adopt this method of thinking, this is because anxiety and worrying is a well trodden path in your brain. If you change the way you think the more you practice it the easier it will become as you create new neural pathways in your brain.

• Take a social media break

This might sound a bit drastic but many years ago when I was suffering from stress, I switched off my Facebook account and stopped looking at the news every day. I did this for a few months and felt so much better. Not having to live up to our social media presence and having to give the impression of a perfect life can take a lot of the pressure off. Also not seeing what everyone else is posting can mean you don’t feel the need to keep up with every latest trend and you can choose what you do based on what you want. This break can last as long as you need it to but it is something I thoroughly recommend doing a few times a year to give yourself a mental refresh.

• Give yourself a break!

Stop being so hard on yourself for not doing everything! The sooner you accept that you are an imperfect human being who will make mistakes and who only has capacity to DO so many things, like we all are, then the better you will feel! You are one person, there are only so many hours in the day, you can only do your best. These are facts.  You already know them, but you choose not to apply them to yourself.

• Take your own advice

If your best friend came to you and said they were feeling how you were feeling, what advice would you give them? probably a lot of the same suggestions as I have written here? Why are we good at giving advice but not applying it to our own lives? Stop and think about what advice you would give to someone else and the apply it to your own life.

• Ask for help if you need it

 Asking for help is NEVER a weakness, it is one of the strongest things you can do. if you are struggling with a lot of work then ask someone for assistance or guidance. If this is work related feeling then you should be able to discuss it with your manager or HR department. The most important thing is to take action before it is too late and you are suffering with severe stress or anxiety.

• Enjoy life!

When we put this much pressure on ourselves life can flash us by in a whirlwind of tasks and stress. Stopping occasionally to take a break and enjoy something, anything, whether it is a nice meal, lovely view, time spent relaxing, can help you feel less stressed and overwhelmed.